While there are many different types of personalities out there, one of the most dangerous, or risky types to a disability claim is that of narcissism. Although I am not a psychiatrist and don’t diagnose anyone as a “narcissist”, I do recognize the characteristics of it, and caution against it when dealing with disability insurers.
According to the Internet, the characteristics of a narcissist are: 1) demonstrating an unreasonable high sense of self-importance, 2) seeks too much attention, 3) wants people to admire them, 4) lacks ability to care about other people, 5) assumes entitlement, and 6) thinks they know more than anyone else about every thing.
I want to be clear here. I’m not writing this article because I have trouble dealing with narcissists. In fact, I am probably the worst nightmare to a narcissist since I don’t put up with “gaslighting”, or attempts to control what my recommendations should be. I am writing this article because people with narcissistic tendencies often attempt to deal with insurance companies themselves, thinking they are the smartest person in the room. I can assure them they are not, and at least some of their behavior is hindering their disability claims by creating “red flags.”
Even I, with my 25 years of experience do not presume to “second guess” what an insurance company will do because the moment you do that, you will be wrong. Still, those with a narcissistic personality might try to control what insurers will ALLOW THEM TO DO, OR NOT DO, and there will be a big denial surprise just around the corner.
I acknowledge that a centrally controlled personality might initially “get over” on the new “paper chasing” claims handlers, but I can also assure insureds that there are smart managers behind the scenes who are documenting “red flags”. These managers are well-acquainted with narcissists and document it in the record.
The most common “offender” are spouses of insureds who are identified as “taking over the management of the claim”. These claims will receive a lion’s share of “risk management” throughout the history of the claim. Allowing a narcissist spouse to communicate with insurers is not a good idea – ever.
While I don’t diagnose narcissistic personalities. (I just deal with the behavior), insurance companies do. Attempting to control the direction of a claim is often identified as a “behavioral issue” (mental and nervous problem) that remains in the record for a very long time. Insurance companies don’t have to do what a narcissist says, and they know that. It is never a win situation.
Narcissist personality types often try to convince insurers they are smarter than they are, or, at least are well-read on the subject of disability claims. I see this most often when insureds spend their time researching successful litigation and then writing long letters citing case precedent. Stop already! Citing case precedent is the job of trained legal counsel. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve seen cases cited when jurisdictions don’t even apply, or are mis-applied. This kind of error makes a narcissist look stupid, not smart.
Finally, my recommendations to someone who has a tendency toward narcissism, is to communicate with insurers in writing only. This will cut down attempts to control situations using influence, entitlement, and self-importance as proof of claim. No one has ever been awarded disability benefits because they control the outcome, or, because they are smart, or entitled. Anyone who plays this game with an insurance company will not collect $200 when they pass go.
People are, who they are, and I’m not suggesting that people should change. I AM suggesting, though, that in the case of narcissism, perhaps it would be a better idea to manage claims behind the scenes and avoid becoming the obvious elephant in the room.
