Here you are. Can’t work anymore, and had to leave your cherished job. You’re worried, disappointed and already missing your co-workers. Upon leaving your job you were handed a stack of application forms to complete in order to file your disability claim. You don’t feel like it. You’re in pain and sick. You really want to sleep and take a nap. Your employer keeps sending you emails, and the insurance company is trying to call you every day. You’ve remembered you need to make another appointment with your doctor. You’re mentally exhausted.
I can’t tell you how many people have contacted me over the years when they’ve had to go out on disability, and become unglued by their health, the situation and the process. Almost immediately, the individual has lost something valuable to them and the grieving process begins. While every persons reaction to the loss of a job and good health is different, I’ve noticed everyone goes through the five stages of grief. Here they are.
- Denial. In the beginning most people deny their disability will last a long time. “Oh, I’m going to go back to work, don’t you worry.” All newly disabled persons are convinced they will be able to return to work short-term. Mostly, its doesn’t work out that way. The problem is that people have a tendency to tell the insurance company they’re going back to work and that causes big problems when they actually can’t. When the optimism sets in try to adopt a more “wait and see” attitude so that your health can be fully diagnosed and treated.
- Anger. Most insureds develop anger especially when they begin to deal with their disability insurers. But, it’s more than that. People get angry at themselves, their employers, their families and other groups because they are no longer able to work. The loss of a career, such as medicine, the law, for example, that cost a great deal of money preparing for is hard to bear. I have to say that in my experience, on both sides of the fence, any loss of a job creates emotional response and it’s hurtful, and people can express that as anger.
- Bargaining. Sometimes insureds try to bargain with their physicians so they can go back to work even when it’s not really feasible. Or, trying to bargain with the insurance company, or bargaining with yourself, “If I keep on this diet, I won’t be sick anymore.” The third stage of grief is tryin to bargain yourself out of permanent disability.
- Depression. The next step is usually some degree of depression and feels of helplessness “that you can’t do anything about it.” “There’s no point,” some insureds tell me, I’m hurt, angry and feel as though I’m depressed all the time. “I lost my job that I love so much and I miss my pager.” (Neonatologists and anesthesiologists usually tell me this.) The loss of job and the uncertainty of the future is depressing, even for those without a disability.
- Acceptance. Eventually, insureds finally reach the point where they accept their disability and inability to return to work. They’ve learned how to deal with the insurance company and have accepted the help of their support group. The former optimism of returning to work is long gone. Adaptation is the norm, and while it still hurts not be be able to work, the individual focuses more on their health.
Leaving work because of a disability is not the end of life but the beginning definition of a new quality of life you hope to live. The process of filing a claim can be daunting for sure, but eventually with or without help, insureds live on with new interests and talents. I believe in the saying, “When God shuts one door, he opens another” because I’ve seen it happen to so many of my clients. And, sure, you’re going to go through the five stages of grief, but in the end you will redefine yourself all over again.
You are not alone. There are experienced people who can help you with your claim. If you’d like to learn more please visit my website located at:
http://www.disabilityclaimssolutions.com
or email lindanee.dcs@gmail.com
